1 sleep

In part I've been dreading writing this one, for lots of reasons. The obvious being that although I'm beyond excited about going "home" I am not so excited about leaving behind my precious friends.

Yes there is email and skype and texts and phones and all of these modes of contact have served me and my Eastern states friendships well over the past seven years but dare I say what anybody who has ever left behind friendships would say, none of that is the same as meeting at Jacobs for some torture  followed up with a Jus or a maccas cheeseburger and a serious download... To share in person good news and bad and to be reminded albeit gently that sometimes you just have to let shit go.

Today's "will miss", number 1, has been mentioned in previous posts and I know that most of you who are reading already know who she is.

What you couldn't possibly know is how she has enhanced my life practically from the day she came into it. This "will miss" is "the admin girl" who influenced my decision to work at ICON. She is the one who shared Jacobs and running in Kings Park, laps in the Beatty Park pool. The one who would take the afternoon off work with me just to get drunk at the Shag and who no matter how much drama I faced in my life kept me grounded and reminded me in 5 words who I truly am.

Divorce can affect you in ways you never even imagine. When you leave a marriage and you're still deeply in love  it's very different to when you leave because you've fallen out of love. The reasons not everyone understands but you know in your heart have broken you to a point where you realise you can only save yourself and "each one must choose" at times seem invalid in your head and heart and you find yourself questioning your decisions. What else could I have done? Maybe I'm the one who has the real issues, maybe I should have just kept my mouth shut and not argued, maybe, what if and so on. Of course I know I could have done some things differently and I have my own demons in that respect but for the most part I think I did my fair share within my marriage.

To have support through times like this is undeniably the only way you come out the other side, the only way you can rise from the ashes and truly start over and my biggest support has been today's will miss.

Working together through the early days of my separation ensured that I was kept sane and reminded that I wasn't the shitty person I was being told I was for standing up for myself. Having her there day in and day out to just tell me I was going to be okay literally saved my life. To know that even when I was being crazy she had my back was some days the only reason I managed to function. It sounds so dramatic but the loss of my marriage was one of the most devastating experiences of my life and to think I caused it confused me beyond words. She helped me reconcile it in my own heart.

My number 1 will miss has the kindest soul I have ever known. Nothing malicious in her at all. A country girl with a big heart who I feel honoured to count among my besties, she guided me through the first months just by being in my life, and how do you even begin to thank someone for that? And not that she would ever expect thanks! She just shrugs her shoulders, sips her drink and says it's what friends do.

It hasn't always been doom and gloom - we were drinking buddies well before my life as I knew it fell apart and lunches in the kitchen and maccas and nandos runs were happy days! The famous fridge cleaning party where she had us cut off at the pub before we even ordered a drink...   Sky blues by the water, hidden vodka in our afternoon OJ and stealing the catering before it went into the boardroom, Australia Day where we decided to rename my youngest son "Bob" and Sunday sessions are all treasured memories!

But by now you're probably wondering what those 5 words she said were. I will finish with those words and tell you all that they have stopped me on many occasions from being a massive twat when my own self control had left me.

The words.... "San, you're not a hater"

Number 1 will miss - Jennine xxx

2 sleeps

In 1994ish "will miss" #2 Doc told us he was going to ask his girlfriend to uproot her life and move to Canberra to be with him. He forewarned us that "she wasn't really like us" meaning that she wasn't a binge drinker who would wake up after a night out and not be quite sure exactly what went on.  He continued saying she was shy, quiet and reserved (I couldn't understand how he thought we may not get on, she sounded just like me...)

Finally the day came and she arrived, I'm certain she would have felt overwhelmed, she was moving into a share house with three sailors whose best friends and closest neighbours (we just happened to live across the park!) were two  banging hot chicks who enjoyed a drink or three but you would never have known if she wasn't comfortable such is her warm nature she simply fitted in with us.

As I write this some 19 years later I prepare for my last nights here and I'm spending them with this"will miss".  So clearly, we got on! During this 19 years we have forged a bond and friendship that has seen us face the passing of friends, the breakdown of relationships, births of our children and the "loss" of Doc to his alcohol addiction.  She has always been there for me. Any time of day or night. When I needed somewhere to run to where I could regain my perspective and sit on my arse and do bugger all it was always her home. Saturday night girls nights with the kids and a few good movies were a favourite as were Halloween parties and her amazing fairy cakes!

Will miss 30 - Karen xx

3 sleeps

Once in a while someone comes along, that one in a million person who just stands out  and you can't quite put your finger on it but you just know they are meant to be a part of your life.

Today's "will miss" is one of the most amazing women I have ever met, her strength, character, compassion and ability to get up and keep going no matter what is thrown her way has inspired me many times over this past 20 months to do the same. Her innate ability to say the "right" words to remind me that I too am a strong and capable person has made my life that little but easier and her open door policy to her home has kept me housed when I quite possibly could have found myself homeless.  Her friendship has been a firm reminder to me that life is precious and God takes care of me no matter what!  I will miss our late night chats and the discussions I seem to only be able to share with her, I will miss her smiling face and reassuring hugs!

Will miss 29 - Adrienne xxx

4 sleeps

Today's will miss has been a difficult one to think on let alone write about.

 As a family we used to go here a few times a year but our must do trip was Mothers Day. Every year we would book a room and stay the weekend. Indulging in leisurely bike rides, swimming at the private beaches, sipping bundy and diet by the waters edge (remember I had the boys with me hence the fact I was sipping the bundy not guzzling it) and treating ourselves in general to a relaxing weekend without a care in the world. Reality couldn't touch us here. There was no fighting, no sadness, no dark times, only bright sunny days and balmy nights that seemed like paradise.

Here it would seem our family could be the perfect unit that many thought we were all the time. The boys would try to push us in the water rather unsuccessfully of course and they would naturally end up in there themselves!  The smiles and laughter were like rainbows to be marveled at and the memories of our times here are treasures that I keep tucked away for the days when thinking about our life as a family isn't too heartbreaking.

The boys would say the only thing missing on these trips was the fat dog (aka Gromit) I would gently remind them no dogs are allowed and Isaac would then pipe in with "yes and Grommy does love to chew his toy quokka he might do it to a real one!"  The quokkas are friendly and don't mind being patted although one did mistake Isaac's chubby bubby finger for food when he was about three... There was a bit of a theme with me encouraging him to pat or get close to the wildlife over here, a black swan also took a snap at him!

Will miss 28 - Rottnest Island!

5 sleeps

A big shout out to my bestie Suey who has been a "have missed desperately" this past 7 years. She's been taking a few liberties with regards to the blog not so much inferring but out rightly stating that she hopes my new home has some great places to eat as my blog is all about food...

In light of this I will say that I'm done with my places to eat and so today's will miss although it really has only in the past 12 months featured more heavily  in my life, it has been a  place to walk, cycle, kayak and help repair my soul.

I would take the boys fishing and watch with delight as they caught a puffer fish and then touched it to make it "get puffy" only to be the one to have to remove the bloody thing from the hook to frantic cries of "hurry mumma he will die!!!"

Watching the sun come up on the water was spectacular and somehow watching the "new dawn" here made life seem that little bit easier at a time when there were days just getting out of bed was a challenge.  My  heart and soul were comforted by  the activities on  and around the water and it is a great place to let yourself  be reminded that truly, you are never alone.

Will miss 27 - The Swan River

6 sleeps

Being a big fan of hamburgers, and with the recent uprising of 'burger' joints popping up around town I was delighted to find today's 'will miss' and will happily admit that it was love at first bite!

The key to a good burger in my opinion: great pattie that isn't the perfect shape, fresh salad, lots of sauce, cheese and a super fresh toasted, soft in the middle bun.

Now given most of the burger joints do gourmet and blah blah burgers, it's good to know you can go and order a burger like the good old days. Beetroot. BBQ sauce. Cheese. Meat. Lettuce. Tomato. Don't get me wrong, I appreciate a great chicken mozzarella burger too.

Many an evening I have sat with friends or the boys, soaking up the buzz of Subi and people watching whilst enjoying my delicious made to order burger and a side of fries.

Will miss 26 - Jus Burgers. And to set the record straight it's pronounced Jus as in Justin, the creators name.

7 sleeps

Today is a bad day. I'm just going to put that out there, a sort of 'disclaimer' of sorts just in case this post doesn't sound as though I'm in the 'missing' mood.

This little exercise has really made me take stock of what is truly important to me. I've never been a materialistic person, I like nice things, pretty things and I am fond of shopping but when it comes to possessions, to quote a recent sermon at mass, what doesn't fit in my coffin, I don't need. (Possession wise).

Services. There are certain services or people that perform these services that I will miss. So today's will miss is dedicated to the people and places that make my life better by way of beauty and relaxation!

Waxing - my waxer in Royal Street bless her, she is a recent find but brilliant. Opening your legs wide without underwear for a strange woman to apply hot wax to your most intimate parts isn't always a comfortable experience but Kelly made it seem second nature and I will miss that.

Hairdresser - although my hairdresser of 6 years ran back to the UK her salon is still here and the person who replaced her used my card to always get my colour right. I will miss Saturday mornings tucked up talking about my life with whoever happens to be doing my hair!

Massages - the folks at Shens do a fab massage and even if it's just a $5 neck massage so that I can feel human again, I always leave feeling better.

Pedicures - there are a couple of places, one in East Vic Park, Innaloo, the city, anywhere that is willing to scrub and file my feet, massage my legs and paint my toenails gets a shout out.

Dog groomer - Carlene is a great girl and does an excellent job of grooming the fat dog even when he's been left for months and almost ends up totally shaved without his schnauzer feathers. She is also a great person who went out of her way to fit us in even when she was uber busy.

Shopping centres - Karrinyup, the City, Innaloo - my local haunts and I'll miss them all.

Will miss 25 - Services in this fair city!